I was helping my 9-year-old daughter do research
for her book report on horseback riding for kids.
So I Googled the following: "pony, ride, under age 18."
... and I swear that's the truth, Your Honor.
(The Covert Comic) @ruminate.com
The great thing about convincing mimes
to join Fight Club -- besides totally
beating their asses -- is knowing
they'll never break rules 1 and 2.
(Brad Simanek) @ruminate.com
Football is a game of inches
-- much like naked limbo.
(Tom Sims) @ruminate.com
I don't fit in with either political party.
I can't be a Democrat because I like to keep
the money I make, but I can't be a Republican
because I like to spend that money on drugs.
(Conor Regan) @ruminate.com
I'm really pissed off that this year's presidential
ballot offers no candidates who are against
education, healthcare, families and children.
(Brian Perbix) @ruminate.com
If you can stay married to Bill Clinton, is
there anything you can't do? On the other hand,
if you're willing to stay married to Bill
Clinton, is there anything you *won't* do?
(The Covert Comic) @ruminate.com
I wanted to start off the new year with
a bang, but the wife said she had a headache.
(Wiley) @ruminate.com
My girlfriend is incredibly self-absorbed.
The good thing is that she saves
a bundle on sanitary napkins.
(Ernest Gunn) @ruminate.com