This is some of Brad's favorite poetry. We'd like to thank for giving us permission to continue publishing a lot of the brilliant poetry found here.


I tend to give credence to that Bible story
in which God put man to sleep and made
woman from his rib, because if man had been
awake and able to make suggestions, women
would surely have many more breasts.

(Brad Wilkerson)

Posted by Ron's Dentist at July 12, 2006


As the judge said, "Let this be a warning:
Three strikes and you're out," I was sure
glad he didn't know I had an 0-2 count when
I pummelled that stupid umpire with my bat.

(Donald Johnson)

Posted by Bittle at July 11, 2006


I went to the doctor for a blood test and
I saw this Asian kid in the waiting room.
He was there for a blood test, too. I thought,
"Crap, I hope they're grading me on a curve."

(Brad Osberg)

Posted by Bittle at July 5, 2006


I always put my daughter's welfare
above my own. She's 18, so I started
dating an 18-year-old so she'd have
somebody her own age to play with.
I hope she appreciates it.

(Steve Mueller)

Posted by Bittle at June 29, 2006


My mother used to tell me you can't put
a price on love. Then again, she really
had a lousy business sense for a hooker.

(Chris MacEachen)

Posted by Bittle at June 23, 2006


Somehow "our song" just isn't as
romantic now that they're using it
in an erectile dysfunction ad.

(Jerry L. Embry)

Posted by Bittle at June 15, 2006


Want proof that men are more creative than women?
Women will gladly pay someone else to build them a
pair of big boobs, while men spend years crafting
their own, using nothing but beer and pizza.

(Scott E. Frank)

Posted by Ron's Dentist at June 8, 2006


"What Would Jesus Do?" may be a good philosophy
of life for some, but I find that it rarely
helps me decide how much to tip a hooker.

(Charles Gulledge)

Posted by Bittle at June 7, 2006


Just when I think I've finally met the
perfect woman, I discover she's too tall
to fit into any of my mom's old clothes.

(Andy Ihnatko)

Posted by Bittle at May 31, 2006


If loving you is wrong, then baby, it
goes a long way towards explaining the
concussion and crushed left testicle.

(Dan, the crazy Croat)

Posted by Bittle at May 25, 2006


Now that I'm approaching middle age, it's
nice to reflect back upon my college days
and to reminisce about all the sex that
I like to believe that I had back then.

(Miles Walker)

Posted by Bittle at May 17, 2006