This is some of Brad's favorite poetry. We'd like to thank Ruminate.com for giving us permission to continue publishing a lot of the brilliant poetry found here.

Poem

Word to the wise: Never take a small pet
into an ethnic restaurant. And by "small pet,"
I mean "prostitute." And by "ethnic restaurant,"
I mean "family Thanksgiving dinner."

(Brian Bell) @ruminate.com

Posted by Ron's Dentist at October 2, 2015

Poem

Can Hillary Clinton generate broad support in
2016? Wait, I didn't mean it that way. I mean:
Will broads support Hillary Clinton in 2016?

(The Covert Comic) @ruminate.com

Posted by Ron's Dentist at May 27, 2015

Poem

Can Hillary Clinton generate broad support in
2016? Wait, I didn't mean it that way. I mean:
Will broads support Hillary Clinton in 2016?

(The Covert Comic) @ruminate.com

Posted by Ron's Dentist at May 27, 2015

Poem

There sure are a lot of safety issues
to worry about when you have a new baby.
Like what if it's really just a midget
posing as a baby so he can feel
up your wife and take your stuff?

(Bob Van Voris) @ruminate.com

Posted by Ron's Dentist at April 17, 2015

Poem

One anatomically correct snowman and the whole neighborhood committee comes down on you

Posted by Ron's Dentist at January 23, 2015

Poem

I figured nothing says "Thank you"
like a few nude photos. Apparently,
though, the priest who married us
would have preferred a simple card.

(Lori Petterson) @ruminate.com

Posted by Bittle at June 30, 2014

Poem

In honor of National Limerick Day:

An old porn star named Ron from Bayside
When asked of his skills, thus replied:
'Tis not the length or the size
Nor the angle of rise
But the delight of the mustache ride

Posted by Bittle at May 12, 2014

Poem

Mustaches come in a variety of ways
Some date back to even pre-historic days
Just clinging to the lip or all over the chin
They adorn an otherwise ordinary grin!

Posted by Bittle at May 2, 2014

Poem

If they had taught abstinence back
when I was in school, I would've aced
it and screwed up the grading curve

(Anthony Myers) @ruminate.com

Posted by Bittle at April 30, 2014

Poem

Maybe if we made kids color inside
the lines instead of allowing this
expressionist BS, they'd be able to
park in a space when they grew up.

(R.M. Weiner) @ruminate.com

Posted by Bittle at February 25, 2014

Poem

Apparently, making love to your gin and tonic
will get you thrown out of most bars, if
not arrested. Thanks for nothing, Billy Joel.

(R.M. Weiner) @ruminate.com

Posted by Bittle at January 22, 2014

Poem

Took the kids up to Nantucket one
weekend for the Limerick Festival.
Boy, was that a mistake.

(Wiley) @ruminate.com

Posted by Bittle at January 7, 2014

Poem

I was visited by three ghosts this Christmas.
They were all family members, and technically
they were all still alive, but I just find it
comforting to imagine they're already deceased.

(Anthony Myers) @ruminate.com

hevpsz
Posted by Ron's Dentist at December 27, 2013