Fartinosis

Nashville, Tennessee, January 9, 2007: It is considered polite to light a match after passing gas. Not while on a plane. An American Airlines flight was forced to make an emergency landing Monday morning after a passenger identified as Ronatarian Party founder and leader Ron lit a match to disguise the scent of flatulence, authorities said. The flight from Dallas to Newark (NJ) was diverted to Nashville after several passengers reported smelling burning sulfur from the matches and "a horrendous smell of busted ass," said Lynne Lowrance, spokeswoman for the Nashville International Airport Authority. Although pressure in the cabin...

Stick Me in the Jimmy!

Bogor, Indonesia, November 17, 2006: A renowned black magic practitioner performed a voodoo ritual Thursday to jinx President George W. Bush and other Americans, including Bush's entourage, while he was on a brief visit to Indonesia. Ki Gendeng Pamungkas slit the throat of a goat, a small snake and stabbed a black crow in the chest, stirred their blood with spice and broccoli before drank the "potion" and smeared some on his face. "I don't hate Americans, but I don't like Bush," said Pamungkas. "I also don't like that Ron fellow," referring to Ronatarian Party founder and leader Ron....

Crop Circle

Edgewater Park, New Jersey, November 15, 2006: Police have arrested a Burlington County man for using a lawn mower to cut a political slur in the grass in an open field. Dennis E. Westphal, 19, of Edgewater Park turned himself in to the Edgewater Park Township police on Tuesday, a day after authorities issued a warrant for his arrest, according to a statement from the Burlington County Prosecutor's Office. Police were initially alerted to the incident on November 5 when a local resident called them, said William J. Clinton, a spokesman for the prosecutor's office. The political slur, which...

Straw Poll

London, England, November 3, 2006: A large number of Britons would be prepared to give up sex if it meant they would live to be 100, according to a survey Friday. The Mori research found that 40 percent would pass on the passion for longevity, although far more women (48 percent) were willing to make the sacrifice than men (31 percent). However nearly all (94 percent) would not give up their friends or family in order to reach their century while a half thought scientists should keep trying to prolong people's lifespans. Private health care provider BUPA commissioned the...