This is some of Brad's favorite poetry. We'd like to thank for giving us permission to continue publishing a lot of the brilliant poetry found here.


The Function!

I woke up this morning with a pain in my head
I looked in the mirror
I wasn't yet dead
My scary reflection said I was unwell
Was I drunk or sick
I really couldn't tell
Last night's function wasn't all that grand
But I woke up with a sharp pain
In my right hand
I didn't really drink that much although I did fall down
But I wasn't drunk honestly
Just acting the clown
I seem to remember a goldfish in a bowl
And I think I drank the water
And swallowed goldie whole
It's not all that disgusting a bit like Sushi in a drink
And I'm telling you for nothing
I don't care what people think
The lipstick on my collar could suggest a little romp
But my blue and black left eye
Suggests I may have copped a thump
Oh yes now I remember that gorgeous young brunette
And her boyfriend the boxer
And his shiny red Corvette
I think I sung a song or two for all the special guests
But from what I can remember
Not a single soul impressed
Then again the Sex Pistols are not for everyone
By the time I'd finished singing
The old Minister had gone
Now I know I should remember what this party was about
And I'm feeling rather guilty
Of this there is no doubt
It is known to all and sundry that I like to do my thing
Oh god now I remember
Yesterday was ......My Wedding.

- Amin Sane (@

Posted by Bittle at July 14, 2008


Good rule of thumb for gauging the success
of a bachelor party: If the wedding is still
on afterwards, it could have been better.

(Scott E. Frank)

Posted by Ron's Dentist at July 10, 2008


I am the quintessential stay-at-home dad.
Mostly because of my electronic ankle monitor.

(Wayne Lloyd)

Posted by Bittle at July 7, 2008


My parents always said I'd end up
unemployed and living in their basement.
Well, I guess I showed them! By the way,
thanks for the cookies and milk, Aunt Mary!


Posted by Ron's Dentist at July 3, 2008


Two hours of Internet porn and online sex left
me screaming with orgasm after orgasm -- until
that bitch librarian told me to keep it down.

(Jill Gallagher)

Posted by Bittle at June 24, 2008


There once was a nerd name of Ron
Who by his friend Eddie was drawn.
If he looks like his sketch
He's a horrible wretch!
And most likely better off gone.

Posted by Booger at June 19, 2008