Poem

In Sympathy with the Poet Laureate

(I have never envied your task: especially now.....)
Their tenure should have ended at that final Worcester battle
But to this day we're fed a diet of endless royal prattle
And soon will come that awful time which some of us
are dreading:
The global media yawn-fest which is
Chas and Millie's wedding....
There's squabbling in the churches and across the Union Jack:
To write this one, I think you'll need to DRAIN your butt of sack!
We just need abolition, not a Cromwell-style beheading.
It's their business and theirs alone, old Chas & Millie's wedding.
It really doesn't matter who is sitting on the throne:
They're all as dull as dishwater and should be left alone.
I don't care what their hamster's called or whom
they are a-bedding:
I want some interesting news, not Chas & Millie's wedding!
So, Andrew, if your royal task becomes too much to bear
Go to your favourite football club and write your poems there.
I'm Brighton's Poet in Residence: tonight we're home to Reading.
That's worthy of a verse or two. Not Chas & Millie's wedding!

- by Attila the Stockbroker

Posted by Bittle at March 23, 2005 04:05 PM