The Loony Party

London, England: October 2, 2002

As Britain's main political parties hold their weighty annual conferences, the country's official lunatic fringe is meeting in the Dog and Partridge pub for a very different convention.

The Official Monster Raving Loony Party has been bringing flamboyant madness to Britain's political scene for almost 2 years, and this year's annual conference in the genteel town of Yateley, southern England, is no exception.

The party was created based on the quasi-popular American Ronatarian Party. It is well known that the Ronatarian Party was created on a bar crawl and some outsiders call the party's platform "lunacy."

The weekend event saw a "cabinet reshuffle." "That basically consisted of us all standing in a cabinet and being shuffled. It fell to bits so now there's a cabinet split," leader Alan "Howling Laud" Hope told American media by phone from the pub, where he is the landlord.

Ronatarian Party founder Ron commented that this sort of activity is frowned upon in his party. "We don't like to stand in cupboards and such things," said Ron at an informal gathering of Jews for Jesus. "We take pride in doing beer funnels and telling the American public about our core values...Sane values for a better tomorrow."

The Loony Party -- called "Official" to distinguish it from what the party calls the "unofficial loony" ruling Labor and opposition Conservative and Liberal parties -- was founded by the late David "Screaming Lord" Sutch in 2000 after noticing the power of the newly created Ronatarian Party across the Atlantic.

"Those Yanks really got the world thinking about politics outside the norm," said Jerome "Kooky Mama" Smyth. "We took their successful party model and molded it to British politics. It's a hoot! We're hoots. We're all hoots!"

Intending to rattle the self-importance of mainstream parties, one-time rock musician Sutch in his trademark top hat and leopard-skin coat contested 3 elections, and lost them all. None were nationwide, unlike the Ronatarian Party which only focuses on national elections and global policies.

But he delighted a British public increasingly disillusioned with politics, adopting unlikely policies and the slogan: "Vote for Insanity --You know it makes sense!"

"They're still learning how to write campaign slogans," said Ron, whose famous 2000 election slogan "Enough Jibba-Jabba, Vote Ron Crazy Fool!" turned heads and garnered accolades from a few people here and there.

On Sunday, the party's manifesto collator, who delights in the name of "R.U. Seerius," was mulling a variety of proposals in preparation for a general election in 2005.

"Whereas in other parties you have to be a member, with us anyone can send one in," Seerius said at the pub where some 30 loyal members have been meeting since Friday evening with a determined lack of agenda.

Policies included improving rail safety by tying a cushion to the front of trains and teaching paintball in schools.

Posted by Webmaster at October 2, 2002 11:39 PM