Polly Want A Beer

Jersey City, New Jersey: October 9, 2003 A man claims a woman wrongly adopted his lost parrot -- and he can prove it if given a chance to question the bird in court. Henrietta, an 11-year-old African gray parrot, flew out of Ronatarian Party Headquarters on July 19 after a party guest who wasn't wearing her glasses accidentally walked into the screen door leading to the balcony. Ron keeps the bird at his political offices as a mascot for his loyal followers -- who often mimic his actions and words. On August 9, Pam Henry, of Newburg, Pennsylvania, adopted an African gray from the Newark Animal Shelter. Ron, convinced the bird is Henrietta, filed a lawsuit seeking an opportunity to depose the parrot. He is seeking $15,000 for pain and suffering if the bird turns out to be his beloved Henrietta. According to Ron, Henrietta's vocal repertoire includes whistling the theme song to short-lived sitcom "Square Pegs" and saying the phrase "Daddy's gotta win an election." Immediately after Henrietta left, Ron said, he had staffers call every animal agency in the area, including the Newark Animal Shelter. Ron said he again called the shelter in mid-July. A receptionist told him that an African gray had recently been adopted. Ron used the Freedom of Information Act to obtain the adoption records. Ron said he drove to Henry's home, but no one answered when he knocked on the front door. He said he saw a bird through the window and felt a connection. "She seemed like she tried to communicate with me," Ron said. "It was like old times with the cuttlebone." Ron was unable to determine if it could whistle the "Square Pegs" tune. Frustrated, he returned home. Henry declined to speak with a New Jersey Spew reporter who visited her house. "We have no comment," she said. "We're not going to fight this in the paper." "...But we will," retorted Ron. "My sweet Henrietta will be back home soon. I know it."

Posted by Webmaster at October 9, 2003 10:16 PM

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