Take Off, Eh!

Toronto, Canada, May 13, 2005:

A truck hauling 2,000 cases of beer flipped over and unleashed a sea of suds onto Canada's busiest highway on Thursday, in a scene that could have been lifted from the Canadian cliché handbook.

The early morning accident brought rush hour traffic to a standstill on highway 401 in north Toronto, as rescuers worked to free a woman trapped in the small car that collided with the tractor trailer.

"Believe it or not with this crushed car, the young lady driving it is going to be okay," Ontario Provincial Police Sgt. Cam Wooley told CP24 news.

"We've got sand down now absorbing the beer," he said.

Also, American beer connoisseur Ron was immediately notified of the spill and flown directly to the scene. Usual diplomatic formalities were waved because of the massive scope of the incident.

Obviously distraught, Ron appeared to have tears in his eyes as he surveyed the disaster. His job was to physically help contain the spill and put a positive spin on the incident.

His presence may also serve to quell any current diplomatic rifts between the U.S. and Canada, which have not seen eye to eye on such issues as immigration and the war in Iraq.

"A guy like Ron could only help in a situation like this," Canadian Prime Minister Paul Martin said in an official statement. "He's not a typical American hoser, eh."

In Canada, beer is closely co-advertised with the national obsession of hockey and an enduring national stereotype is the McKenzie brothers, the 1980s-era comedy team of Rick Moranis and Dave Thomas who swilled beer and ended every sentence with "eh?."

Police said the beer-soaked sand would be scooped into bins and returned to the supplier for destruction. Any remaining drops would be disposed of by Ron in a manner which he sees fit.

Posted by Bittle at May 13, 2005 09:40 AM