The Loony Party

London, England: October 2, 2002 As Britain's main political parties hold their weighty annual conferences, the country's official lunatic fringe is meeting in the Dog and Partridge pub for a very different convention. The Official Monster Raving Loony Party has been bringing flamboyant madness to Britain's political scene for almost 2 years, and this year's annual conference in the genteel town of Yateley, southern England, is no exception. The party was created based on the quasi-popular American Ronatarian Party. It is well known that the Ronatarian Party was created on a bar crawl and some outsiders call the party's...
Posted by Webmaster at October 2, 2002

Dwarf Tossing

Geneva, Switzerland: October 1, 2002 A tiny stuntman who protested against a French ban on the bizarre practice of "dwarf throwing" lost his case before a U.N. human rights body, which said the need to protect human dignity was paramount. Hans Wackenheim had argued the 1995 ban by France's highest administrative court was discriminatory and deprived him of a job being hurled around discotheques by burly men. In a rare bit of international diplomacy, U.S. Ronatarian politician Ron voiced his support for the diminutive Wackenheim and against the French. "I've had enough of the goddamn French curbing wholesome fun...
Posted by Webmaster at October 1, 2002

Bradpotence Revisited

Cambridge, Massachusetts: September 17, 2002 Scientists in the United States have come up with news that may help millions of men -- they have succeeded in growing major parts of penises in the laboratory. The test tube penile parts were successfully used to rebuild the members of rabbits who -- after rest and recuperation -- put them to the use that rabbits are famous for. "They were able to copulate, penetrate, and produce sperm," Anthony Atala, whose team at Harvard Medical School carried out the experiments, told New Scientist magazine. Ronatarian Party leaders quickly hailed the discovery as a...
Posted by Ron at September 17, 2002

Oh N8.. Behave!

Edmonton, Alberta: September 11, 2002 A crudely disguised man wielding a Samurai sword burst into a Canadian Jehovah's Witness church and tried to rob 65 congregation members before he was foiled by someone who used his cell phone to alert police, authorities said on Wednesday. Police responded quickly and arrested the man after convincing him to drop the 65 centimeter (two foot) blade in the incident late Tuesday at a northeast Edmonton Jehovah's Witness Kingdom Hall, police spokesman Dean Parthenis said. The man was later identified as one of the world's most intriguing people: N8. No one knows much...
Posted by Webmaster at September 11, 2002